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A thrashing for 'Clash of the Titans' - His and Her Reviews

Ashley Cook

I watched the ‘80s version of “Clash of the Titans” on television many times when I was a child. Up until a few weeks ago, I had not seen the classic since then. Knowing a new version of the film was about to be released in theaters, Forest and I decided to watch the original.

We were amused by the old stop motion animation special effects, and so we laughed, but not with any ill will, we were just amazed at what was back then an innovative filmmaking attempt.

Years ago, creative controllers wanted to do so much, but technology was limited.

In the beginning of the original, there is a bird flying over several mountains that are overgrown with lush plant life. The bird is obviously dubbed into the scene which was probably shot from either a small plane or helicopter.

When the bird arrives at Olympus, the headquarters of the gods, with some choppy magical transformation, the bird turns into Poseidon, the sea-god. It’s good for a guffaw.

Today, many people hope current moviemaking mechanisms like computer-generated imagery will enhance old films when they’re being redone.

“Clash of the Titans” producers did not use their modern resources wisely.

Mentally preparing for this new version of the movie, my head was swirling with hope.

I need a film to have some literary merit for me to be fully satisfied, but good spectatorship is important too. The recent movie remake did not satisfy either anticipation.

I often just want to be mindlessly entertained. During the 2010 showing, my individual psychological reader-response school of philosophy began to surface.

I was straining to associate the storyline with my most recent “leisurely” reading about a therapist’s personal experience with patients who were dealing with a range of recent-neurosis. So, I was trying to deconstruct Perseus’ motivations, but nothing came to fruition.

Then, at one point I almost fell asleep, only to reawaken during the most wonderful, slithery Medusa scene.

When I was a child watching the original “Clash of the Titans,” Medusa made some kind of impression on me, but I could not pinpoint it since my memory has faded. I had a watered-down negative predisposition towards her. She was a wicked female monster.

When Medusa appeared in this year’s record-breaking Easter weekend $61.4 million money maker, I couldn’t control my less-than-innocent snicker right as the gorgon turned several side characters into stone. I looked at Forest, who had a worried grimace, and asked, “What?” He said, “Don’t ask me what.” This movie moment was the only part that really delighed me.

Forest Rhodes

Staff Writer

If you were to go to see the film “Clash of the Titans” expecting to see a worthy modern rendition of the 1981 classic of the same name, you’d be very disappointed.

Instead, if you were expecting a poorly written action flick with inconsistent visual effects, campy costumes, poor acting, miserable fight choreography, baffling character choices, and a badly designed plot that only superficially brushed any of the story elements of the original Greek myth or its film predecessor and added absurd new ones, well... this isn’t the movie review for you.

I’ve never seen such talent wasted in a film. With renowned actors Liam Neeson and Ralph Fiennes from “Schindler’s List” reunited again, in arguably similar roles, one would assume that same potent dynamic between them would have manifested.

Instead I spent more time comparing their facial beards, and noting how remarkably similar to each other they looked while the two actors belabored to explain why any of the film’s conflicts made any sense or had any relevance.

Where the 1981 “Clash of the Titans” attempted to more faithfully follow the ancient Greek myth, this new ones decides to take a new and unimaginative twist – the gods are not as invulnerable as they would have their followers believe. It turns out their immortality and power is fueled by the prayers, hopes, and fears of mankind.

One would think this bit of information would be the most closely guarded secret in the universe.

Contrary, mankind is acutely aware of it. So aware that every generation or so they tend to rise up against the gods and try to surplant them, at which time the gods let loose a horrendous beast known as the Kraken to put them back in their place.

Perseus is unfortunate to wander a tad too close to one of these uprisings, and his family is killed in the crossfire by the angered god, Hades.

Bent on revenge, he allies himself with the human rebellion and goes on a desperate quest to discover a means to kill the Kraken.

During his journey, he encounters and overcomes many obstacles such as Borat and Sean Connery impersonators, fight scenes reminiscent of Kevin Sorbo’s “Adventures of Hercules,” fake beards, glowing blue-eyed lizard gypsy men that ride giant scorpions (I wish I was making that up), unfulfilled prophecies, nepotism in the industry (as I can’t believe some of these people got into the movie any other way), and one hot Medusa.

My recommendation is to rent the 1981 classic on Amazon.com for a couple bucks. You’ll save money, and find it more entertaining.

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