Kicking It on vacation

Vacations. Can there ever be enough good words said about them? Or is it even possible to have too many? My husband thinks so. He believes one must finish one before planning the next. Naturally, we differ on this.

After all, isn’t the unspoken, universal promise of 50 years of steady employment that we get to take vacations anytime we want? Don’t we all trust that once retirement finally arrives, we can start taking vacations at will even one after another? Anytime we want?

It has always been my philosophy to live like I am dying. Well, it’s true.

Alas, now that our state is coming to its senses, perhaps soon we will once again have our liberties restored and depart from our homes unrestricted.

Here is the thing. Ideally each vacation will differ from a past one. OK, we have repeated some cruises. It happens. They were spectacular the first time or they offer free ukulele lessons as in the case of our frequent return cruises to Hawaii because my husband likes the free ukulele classes onboard. Oh, and he professes to like the people he meets in strumming class. I, on the other hand, enjoy my own company.

Since 2017, we have spent over 100 days at sea. Pretty good for a pair of land lovers. Naturally, 2020 was a blank since the cruise lines canceled all voyages. Making that a 100 days at sea in three years.

That said, we are taking our maiden river cruise this coming year along the Mississippi river departing out of New Orleans on a paddle wheeler.

I, for one, do not understand why they are so proud of these journeys charging double and sometimes triple what the large ships expect for their voyages. I do not believe it has a thing to do with size and number of passengers, I am more inclined to believe it is the bases of capitalism, supply and demand.

Most rooms are not larger than a walk-in closet and the daily tipping is billed at a whopping $19.50 per person per day. While an “industry wide” practice, it is an ongoing push for passengers to pay the wages for the crews on cruise ships, and I for one resent being responsible for any business’ payroll responsibilities.

Did you know the purser or customer service will allow this fee to be adjusted up or down? I prefer a personal tip versus tipping the general pool.

Routing our way back to California, we have decided to stop through Texas. We’ll visit Waco, Texas, drift along the San Antonio River Walk, pop in to the Alamo and swing through Austin before returning home.

Why Texas? Think there’s a 9% savings on state taxes. Waco, Texas, you ask? Several reasons off the top of my head. Chip and Joanna Gaines film their show “Fixer Upper” there. My children’s family cemetery is there. Plus for fun, Waco, Texas, has some nasty-tasting-restorative mineral water that you gotta trick fellow travelers into tasting. Naturally, you can only sucker them once.

Waco, Texas, is also the home of Baylor University, the Texas Ranger Museum and the former home of the Branch Davidians Cult which was stormed by federal agents after a 51-day siege back in 1993.

Right after we get home and wash our clothes, we’ll repack for a weeklong stay along our California coast. I am excited to fulfill a long-overdue wish to enjoy a place on the sand at the beach.

Like many desires, once the decision was made, the selection process was difficult. Wanting the perfect rental for family and friends, we have finally settled on a location. Oddly enough it was determined by our 7-year-old grandson who does the happy dance every time he sees his bunk room with a bathroom.

Up next? I’ll probably take a vacation to Alaska to visit my daughter before the year ends. Although, I wish she’d meet me in Seattle for a cruise to anywhere. I enjoy shipboard living. Basically, I am lazy. After all, it’s lovely to have all my meals prepared, the bed made, the room tidied every day and onboard entertainment, along with happy bartenders. Wait a minute, I mostly get that a home. My husband is our house steward, but he demands more than just a few dollars tip money every day.

Even so I do not wish to go just anywhere. I just wanna go where I wanna go when I wanna go. And I am ready to go now.

Elizabeth Youngman-Westphal can be reached at [email protected].